Setting Boundaries for Our Children

When it comes to our children, we have to lay down guidelines. We must put up boundaries. If we do not, they will not learn that there are consequences to their actions. however, all too often I see parents allowing their children to behave in ways that are not healthy to themselves or even to others.

Proverb 22:15 — Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.

This Proverb tells us that as parents we need to correct our children, however some parents fear that if they punish their child, that the child may not love them any more. However, the exact opposite is true. It is a proven fact that children who are given boundaries and punished (appropriately) for violation of those boundaries, grow up with a greater love and respect for their parents then those who aren’t.

When I speak of consequences, I mean appropriate punishment that will redirect the negative behavior of the child to a more favorable direction. Parents too, need restraint when it comes to punishing their children. Parents must not over due the punishment.

It’s also important to remember that a parent’s job and responsibility does not end when the child is full grown. Parents must always be willing to guide their children in the right direction and to stand up to their children whenever they see them heading in the wrong direction. Even if that means conflict.

A common mistake parents make is the belief that once their children are grown, that the parenting stops there. That is not true! Children need to feed off their parents’ wisdom and guidance for as long as the parents lives. A dear friend of mine once told me that the hardest part of his father’s passing was not having him there to offer advice, even though him and his father often disagreed on many things.

I applaud the parents who are teaching and enforcing boundaries and rules to their children, and shame on those parents who allow or tolerate inappropriate behavior from their children. I believe the world would be a better place if more parents would step up and stand up to their children when needed.

Study Verses (KJV):
Proverb 4:1 — Hear, ye children, the instruction of a father, and attend to know understanding.
Proverb 5:7 — Hear me now therefore, O ye children, and depart not from the words of my mouth.
Proverb 7:24 — Hearken unto me now therefore, O ye children, and attend to the words of my mouth.
Proverb 8:32 — Now therefore hearken unto me, O ye children: for blessed are they that keep my ways.
Proverb 13:22 — A good man leaveth an inheritance to his children’s children: and the wealth of the sinner is laid up for the just.
Proverb 14:26 — In the fear of the LORD is strong confidence: and his children shall have a place of refuge.
Proverb 15:11 — Hell and destruction are before the LORD: how much more then the hearts of the children of men?
Proverb 17:6 — Children’s children are the crown of old men; and the glory of children are their fathers.
Proverb 20:7 — The just man walketh in his integrity: his children are blessed after him.
Proverb 20:11 — Even a child is known by his doings, whether his work be pure, and whether it be right.
Proverb 22:6 — Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.
Proverb 22:15 — Foolishness is bound in the heart of a child; but the rod of correction shall drive it far from him.
Proverb 23:13 — Withhold not correction from the child: for if thou beatest him with the rod, he shall not die.
Proverb 23:24 — The father of the righteous shall greatly rejoice: and he that begetteth a wise child shall have joy of him.
Proverb 29:15 — The rod and reproof give wisdom: but a child left to himself bringeth his mother to shame.
Proverb 29:21 — He that delicately bringeth up his servant from a child shall have him become his son at the length.
Proverb 31:28 — Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.